215. “We will sell no wine before its time.”

The episode:The Indestructible Man,” ep. 409

The riff: Intoned by Joel in a deep voice as a drip-bag is set up on an IV and slowly drains into the Frankenstein-type creature being constructed by a mad scientist.

The explanation: They’re referring to a well-known series of ads from the 1970s for the California wineries of Paul Masson, an early proponent of California’s wine industry. “We will sell no wine before its time” was the company’s slogan, and the delivery in the commercial is in the style of Orson Welles, who was on-air face of those ads. As with many things involving late-career Welles, there’s a sad twist, as the formerly great director was apparently drunk on the product all the time when he was on set. An outtake even exists where a severely inebriated Welles tries to read his lines.

Novelty factor: Never heard the slogan before, but I’m not surprised at all about the Welles connection. Watching those outtakes made me very sad.


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